Mapping the Way

God directs our steps, but sometimes we need to sit down with him and map out where we are going. 

The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand. 
Psalm 37:23-24

I’m going to be completely honest and transparent in this blog.
About six months ago, I seriously considered giving up on my dream of making a living off writing or even having a career as an author. The harder I seemed to pray, plan, and work at writing, the less I earned each month.

We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.
Prov. 16:9 

No Rope Left...

I started to get depressed and felt as if I were a complete failure. Finally, I threw up my hands and told the Lord, “I think it’s time for me to find something else. I’ve become a drain on my family. I’m not even making enough to pay the few bills on my own that I promised to take care of.”

Before I go on, I want to say that I'm not sharing this to make people feel sorry for me. But to say that we all have our miry pit moments. Everyone does. This is how I found a way back on solid ground. I didn't do it on my own, trust me. 

His response was, “I’m enough. I will provide."​

And He did. My bills did get paid, but not from what I earned. Though I’m grateful for His hand in our lives, and His provision, I was still left feeling as if I was a big failure. 
And as the Lord is prone to do when we come to our end, he holds out His hand and offers us a step up if we’ll be willing to keep going. So, I agreed that I wouldn’t give up yet, but there needed to be some big changes because what I’ve been doing wasn’t working.
I swear that I felt him give me a huge smile as if to say that’s what he’d been waiting for all along.

This required me to give up doing everything by my own strength and to let him show me a different way. A way where I walk so closely with him in everything I do, it’s like we’re connected at the hip. Ha. Can you picture it? When I picture it, I laugh.
But here’s the thing…
Since I’ve made more of an effort to work WITH the Lord, instead of by what the world or other fellow authors say, things have changed. Not in ways I can see with my human eyes. My income is still way down, but my vision for how I do things, what I want, what I plan to do has changed.

​The heaviness weighing me down has started to lift.

Outwardly, things seem the same. inwardly, everything has changed! 

 I am God, your God, who teaches you how to live right and well. I show you what to do, where to go.
Isaiah 48:17 MSG

​Looking at Work in a New Way-- 

Before, I was told that the way to make money was to spit out books as fast as possible. That’s not what the Lord said. There was a foundation I needed to set down in my business practices.
Business practices? Ha, what was that? I am not business-minded. 

Guess what? He’s teaching me. Ideas come as needed. Videos or posts on social media that show me how to look at my writing with a business mind come from sources I didn’t even know existed. How to market without breaking the bank. How to present myself more professionally. How to create extra streams of income based on the talents He’s given me. 

Even more important… how to learn to serve people…those who read my books, who follow me on social media and other places. He is showing me how to be a light in a dark world. His light.

So, why am I writing all this? ​

To explain a few things. Because I will no longer spit out books because the prevailing advice is to publish fast and frequently.  I have 37 books in my catalog right now. If they can’t provide a living for me (and I’m not asking for a lot), then what’s the point of putting out more rubbish?
I don’t think my books are rubbish. I spent some time during the holidays looking over the reviews that some of you have left me. You don’t seem to think my books are horrible. I don’t either. Some are better than others. Sure. 
I want…no need…to get my joy for writing back. It won’t come if I’m under pressure and rushing through the process. You can’t stop to smell the roses if you’re racing through the garden, right? No, we need to slow down, take our time, make an effort to be sure that the garden is well-tended and thriving. I want my stories to thrive. To bless those who read them. To even get a chuckle or eye-roll over the lightheartedness. I want to do better.

I have to stop ignoring all the backlist books I’ve written. That means I’ll have to make myself figure out how to market on a shoestring budget. The Lord is providing a means to learn and ideas to try out. I have pages full of ideas in my notebook of things to do. But it all takes work and time. I have to make that time. I have to be more dedicated to my work. I’ve been a bit lackadaisical (fancy word for slacking) in how I managed my work. 
I’ve not been purposeful. God is all about having a vision and a purpose for every one of us. We have to figure out what that is, what it looks like. And then we have to sit down WITH Him and map out a plan.

​

 But I trust in you, Lord: I say, “You are my God. My times are in your hands.”
Psalm 31:14-15

​That’s where I am right now. The little picture at the beginning of this post had a mouse sitting at a desk surrounded by stacks of books and papers. That’s me! I’m mapping out a plan. I’m opening my heart and spirit to the Lord and trying hard to listen for His direction and desires for me. 
I believe that I have something to offer. More than just allegories and fantastical tales. I’ve been through stuff. Some of it comes out in my books. Some I keep close because I've been told that it’s not good to be open. I think that’s bull. 
We all have trials and triumphs that can help others along on their journey. Why hide them under a bushel? Nope, let’s share what we’ve learned, what we’ve experienced, and how God has brought us through the fire and water moments. This world gets darker by the day. We are called, as children of the Most High King, to be lights. To help light the way for our fellow travelers.  (See the picture of the little fellow with a book and light.)

Do you think that’s true? Tell me in the comments if you do or don’t.  I’m interested in discussing it.
​My dog Banjo isn’t that great of a conversationalist. Ha!

So, in all this, I’m asking for your patience as I figure out my way to doing better with the talents and gifts the Lord has given me. More stories will come. I hope that they’ll be better and more engaging with each new one. I desire to see more hearts touched. That’s my main purpose. I want to tell stories that inspire and encourage us all to be our best selves. To take part in His kingdom and to bring others in. 
That’s just a small thing, don’t you think? 
Ha. Right. Anyway…
If you’ve read this far, thank you. If you are reading this blog post on my website, please have a look around. I’ve been sprucing things up. Making it easier to get to where you want to go, to find what you need. There’s more to come. So much more. I hope we can continue our journey together and that we all with see some amazing things in the coming months. 
Blessings! 
J. Castle